Top Ten Utah Movies and then some

By Mr. Blunderson

Big C showed up at the cave tonight bearing a gift from our good friend Hero Stew. It was a copy of one of my all time favorite movies Fletch. Now As much as I love this movie there is one little down side. Talking about it makes me feel old since a lot of young people today either haven't heard of it or didn't think it was very funny. Young people! Bah!

Instead of rambling on and on about how great Fletch is, I did get another idea... One of the funniest things about Fletch is the Utah angle. As a resident of the beehive state I find those references extra hilarious. But this got me thinking, so I'd like to present you my list of my top ten Utah movies of all times. Researching my list I was surprised at some of the titles I came up with, so I am extending it to include honorable mentions and some "gee whiz" insights as well.

Keep in mind that most of these movies were only partially shot in Utah, but that's good enough for me.

Lets kick this party off with Mr. Blunderson's Top Ten Utah Movies

10 - Seven Brides for Seven Brothers (1954)

I had to include this because I know how much it will piss off Mrs. Blunderson. She would complain that the movie is blatantly sexist. Although she has a point, it's funny to me since the so-called "brothers" wear more fringe than the Village People. I also happen to know this is a film that Big C enjoys and we both chuckle at the "cap gun" sound effects when the brothers cause the avalanche.

Something that Mrs. Blunderson may not know about this film is that the script was based on a short story called The Sobbin' Women which was itself based on an ancient roman legend The Rape of the Sabine Women. I for one would love to see an updated version of this film that ends with a shit load of restraining orders.

On a side note, if you visit the wikipedia page for the movie, there is an excellent demonstration of pan and scan versus wide screen presentation. If you are one of those people that thinks "Full Screen" simply chops a few inches off either side of the shot you can finally see just how wrong you are.

9 - Planet of the Apes (1968)

I don't know how much of this was actually shot here but Glen Canyon Utah is listed as one of it's locations, a fact I learned only in the last hour. How cool is that? One of the most iconic movies period was at least partially filmed in my scenic and beautiful yet clearly bass-ackwards state.

As I run it though the memory processor, did the ship crash land into Lake Powell? I'm geeking out a little here. This new knowledge gives such a deeper meaning to Heston's final words "You Maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!"

8 - Better Off Dead (1985)

John Cusack, hot foreign exchange student, monster eggnog made with lighter fluid, the worst (and thus the best) 80's high school dance, Japanese drag racing brothers, David Odgen Stiers, claymation fast food, the K-12, worlds best Chrsitmas presents ("you like corn"), people throwin away a perfectly good white boy, the first time we see the TV/fireplace shtick in cinema, a villain named Stalin, kicking ass on one ski, and to drink... Peru!

Need I say more? Oh, I failed to mention the slopes in this movie were Utah's own Alta and Snowbird resorts.

And I almost forgot - "I WANT MY TWO DOLLARS!"

7 - Over the Top (1987)

This is one of the worst movies ever made. I only bring it up because Stallone really does owe me the money for renting it not once but twice. The only fond memory I have relating to this heap of crap is an SNL sketch where Norm MacDonald slams it by saying that Kramer Vs Kramer (which also dealt with the sensitive issue of child custody) wasn't as good as Over the Top because there wasn't any arm wrestling in it.

6 - Legion of Fire: Killer Ants (1998)

The first of two made for TV movies on my list, this bad boy was filmed in and around Heber, which is just a short drive up the canyon from here and home to one of the best places on earth to get a milkshake. The real star of this movie is Mitch Pileggi who spent years "also starring" as A.D. Skinner on The X-Files. Here he gets a chance to kick some insect ass and take names. The plot might seem a little silly when the whole problem of the ants could have been solved by giving all the kids in town magnifying glasses... I don't remember if it was overcast that day. Not a great movie, but it's Mitch. And compared to Over the Top its Citizen Cane.

5 - National Lampoons Vacation (1983)

Yes, Chevy Chase debuts on my list in a move that isn't Fletch. Here's one of the all time great road trip movies that sadly gets ignored by younger audiences today (damn whippersnappers) because they've already seen all the movies that were influenced by it. This is one of those "passing through Utah" movies, but this is my list so get over it! I was going to put Footloose as number 5 but when I asked myself which movie I'd rather turn on the TV and watch right now, the answer was Vacation by a landslide.

4 - The Searchers (1956)

Unappreciated in its own time, this film has come to be regarded as one of the best westerns ever made. It's hard to go wrong with John Wayne starring in a John Ford directed shindig, and even though it looks dated now and might be a bit tough to watch, the scope and themes are still as epic and bold as they ever were. There is a harshness to this movie, especially as it relates to the treatment of Native Americans and the racism and genocide that existed in the old west. To white wash over that would be an injustice to the past, and The Searchers is certainly more honest in that respect than most film from that era regarding the subject matter.

3 - Rubin & Ed

Trent Harris is a local filmmaker who doesn't shy away in reveling from Utah's weirdness. Why hide it? We should be proud of it, it's one of our most precious resources. One interesting note about this cult classic about two young republicans, one of which may or may not be the king of the echo people, in search of a burial place for a beloved deceased pet is that it never mentions Mormons once (Of course, Harris has a whole other film where he slams the LDS weirdness, and I do mean slam). Who could have predicted the chemistry between Howard Hesseman and Crispin Glover? This movie is unapologetically bizarre, charming, and completely hysterical.

2 - The Executioners Song (1982)

Another made for TV movie but important for so many reasons. This film (shot in Orem and Provo, Utah) based on the Norman Mailer book of the same name tells the story of murderer Gary Gilmore who committed his crimes and later lobbied for his own execution. He was the last person to be executed by firing squad (as far as I know, anyway). The real Gary Gilmore committed one of his two murders about 500 hundred feet from where I currently live. Also, you can't ignore that this was the performance that made Tommy Lee Jones.

1 - Fletch (1985)

Willy - What the hell you need ball bearings for?
Fletch - Awww, come one guys. it's so simple. Maybe you need a refresher course.
(Leans on hot engine part)
Fletch - Hey! It's all ball bearings nowadays. Now you prepare that Fetzer valve with some 3-in-1 oil and some gauze pads. And I'm gonna need 'bout ten quarts of anti-freeze, preferably Prestone. No, no make that Quaker State.


For better or worse, that's my list. Before she went to bed, Mrs. Blunderson gave me her top five Utah movies:

5 - Rubin and Ed

for it's cult status and the air of coolness it brings to Utah. (and I think she likes the shoes)

4 - The Conqueror

Here's a flick that is still relevant today, not so much it's content but how it relates to down winders and the irresponsibility of the early days of atomic weapons testing. This movie was a bomb (critically and financially), John Wayne was cast as Genghis Kahn, and likely due to the literal bomb (fallout ridden soil from weapons testing) 91 out of 220 cast and crew members developed some form of cancer. Although there is some dispute between the diagnosis and the actual cause of the cancer (46 died by 1981), this is a drama that has sadly played out in too many south western communities.

3 - Savannah Smiles

This is a cute little tear jerker that reflects the local family values that doesn't manage to end like one of those movies in seminary where someone bares their testimony. Great use of locations.

2 - Independance Day

For nothing else but the scene with all the RV's rolling across the Salt Flats and Bill Pullman ftw (whatever that means)

1- Footloose

The prom at Lehi Roller Mills, the irony of the community with ultra conservative values (makes Utah conservatives look like a bunch of liberal hippies I tell you), the late Chris Penn busting a move, and for Kevin Bacon showing us all that the best way to blow off steam is to dance. Just dance dammit!

By the way, if you know what scene I'm talking about... you've been served!

HONORABLE MENTIONS

Dumb & Dumber - SLC International, baby!
Galaxy Quest - Hooray for Goblin Valley.
Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade - so what if there aren't really caves in the famed double arch.
Vanishing Point - an inspiration of QT's Grindhouse entry Death Proof
Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid - it was tough to leave it off my list I swear
The Stand - Of all the movies listed here this was filmed closest to where I actually lived
The Sandlot - if only for the line "You're killing me Smalls!"
Thelma and Louise - can you beieve Goldy Hahn and Meryl Streep were at one point up for the roles?
Austin Powers in Goldmember
Back to the Future III
Revenge of the Ninja - Nice to see at least one Ninja flick lensed inside our holy borders.
SLC PUNK! - Love it or hate it (or just like it) at least someone made a film about local counterculture.
The Electric Horseman
Joy Ride - JJ Abrahms directing and Steve Zahn co-stars. Nuff said.
The Philadelphia Experiment
Stage Coach
Species - I still can't believe Ben Kingsly was in this movie. He was Ghandi, dude!
The Outlaw Josie Wales
Maverick

And Last but not least, here are some films that made me say "Gee Whiz" when I learned parts were filmed in Utah

Easy Rider
2001 a Space Odyssey
Casablanca
The Greatest Story Ever Told
Superman III
The Ten Commandments

I could go on and on but I wanted there to be room for others to comment and make their own suggestions. Utah is an odd place but Hollywood loves us just enough to keep putting our best parts on the big screen... our scenery.

There are also some movies I intentionally left off the list. Spare me your hate mail because I don't consider Mission Impossible II a movie. It's just a feature length montage. And I haven't seen those High School: The Musical movies... admittedly, I probably won't until someone holds a gun to my head and says "watch, damn you watch!"

I wouldn't be much of a film jerk if I'd have it any other way.