REVIEW - The Black Dahlia

by Mr. Blunderson

Here is a movie that would have been better named The Blah Dahlia. Leave it to Brian De Palma to make one the most infamous unsolved crimes in our nations history boring. The characters in this film could have existed anywhere or even anytime, while the true story of Elizabeth Short feels tacked on and brushed aside until the end, where the film sadly only gets ridiculous.

There is a growing trend in Hollywood where filmmakers take pieces of history--already exciting, dramatic, and rich--only to use them as scenery for tedious fictional characters and standard cookie cutter plots. The Black Dahlia takes this to a whole new level, since the plot is so disjointed and yawn inducing. If you know anything about the historical aspects of this case, avoid this film like the plague. Nowhere in this movie will you find anything resembling the actual investigation or the many possible suspects. It seems to me there is plenty of room for suspense, drama, and intrigue if one were to draw from the actual history of the case.

The performances were a mixed bag, with the best coming from the smaller and supporting roles (Aaron Eckhart, Hillary Swank). Josh Hartnett continues to baffle me as to why he gets put in films at all. The less I see of him the better. In this case he comes across as a double whammy since he is not only the lead but the narrator as well (gotta love that noir). Scarlett Johansen was flat and uninteresting which disappointed me so much I might have to stop stalking her.

Bottom line is this movie was not engaging. On a good day it will only induce coma. Even the discovery of a grisly murder doesn't get your heart pumping since it gets buried in everything else that is going on. The film was too ambitious for its own good. Less could have been so much more. I'm half tempted to dig up the James Ellroy novel (from which this film was adapted) but I fear that I'll simply be forced to write yet another scathing review from the same drab source material.

I didn't hate everything about this movie. One thing Brian De Palma always delivers is a film that looks good. As far as period pieces go, The Black Dahlia is visually stunning. Watching it made me ache for my VHS copy of The Untouchables that I lost so many years ago. If only the script could have matched his vision.

On the Mr. Blunderson ratings scale, The Black Dahlia rates a "don't bother."